Shit: Time Warp Back to When Dolly, Tim Curry and U.S. Constitution Were Alive Not Working
Despite multiple attempts at just a jump to the left, and then a step to the right, putting their hands on their hips, bringing...
Family That Left Food Out on Porch for St. Jimothy Wakes Up to Yard Full of Presents
After leaving pet food out on the porch overnight in hopes St. Jimothy soon would be there, one Ballard family woke up this morning...
Adorable New Video Shows Moment Jimothy Escaped Henry Mural as a Baby
A newly discovered video shows absolutely precious footage of the moment viral internet sensation Jimothy the raccoon lept off a Henry mural into real...
Nation Almost Kills All Sexist 9-to-5 Bosses in Loving Tribute to Dolly Parton
In a loving tribute to legendary songwriter, actor, business leader and philanthropist Dolly Parton, today the nation came together to almost kill their sexist...
Nation Reminded This Is Last Day You Can Talk About Jimothy
Just in case anyone forgot or has been too busy crocheting the visage of the nation’s favorite short-spined raccoon, today the nation was reminded...
World Cup Tourist Blissfully Unaware Every Seattle Limebike Seat Now Covered in Fremont Taintjuice
One World Cup tourist blissfully unaware every Limebike seat he rode on today was covered in a naked Fremont Solstice Parade reveler’s taintjuice over...
Paleontologists Believe Early Ford Raptor Had Feathers
After years of debate, Washington State University paleontologists believe a fossil just discovered at The Gorge finally proves that the early Ford Raptor did...
Bumble Bees at Sequim Lavender Festival Baked AF
As is tradition in their annual pilgrammage to celebrate puffing their favorite strain of bud, today bumble bees at the Sequim Lavender Festival by...
Study Finds Siren-Related Deaths Among Sailors Way Down
In more proof that crime rates aren’t as high as people make them seem sometimes, today a study confirmed that Siren-related deaths among sailors...
Pigeon Does Some of His Best Shitting by Carwash
Known for his big, white, splattery shits that cover the passenger side window, all the way down to the rear car door handle, fans of...
