Geese Can’t Believe How Much Crap Humans Leave in Grass
A flock of Canada geese looking to relax and picnic on a local park lawn today said they couldn’t believe how much crap humans...
Seattle Resident Applies Rain-X Directly to Skin to Avoid Needing Umbrella
Tired of needing an umbrella everyone makes fun of him for using to stay dry during real downpours, today one clever Seattle man applied...
Ai Weiwei Exhibit at Olympic Sculpture Park Is Very Deep, and I Totally Get It
Ai Weiwei’s view-dominating homage to animal heads just installed at Olympic Sculpture Park is controversial—for SOME people, anyway. But me? I totally get it.
In...
‘Doesn’t Get Much Better Than This,’ Says Seattle Man Enjoying 37-Minute Window of Sunshine at Gas Works
After a long stretch of rain, one local man expressed his gratitude for a 37-minute window of sunshine he enjoyed at Gas Works Park...
Creeptozoologist Uploads Bigfoot Pics to WikiFeet
The field of creeptozoology took one big footstep forward today as local creeptozoologist Dan McDonald uploaded the first clear and confirmed photos of Bigfoot’s...
Local Plant Addict Just Signs Paycheck Over Directly to Swansons Nursery
Following a year of ever-expanding home foliage, today one local man resigned himself to his crippling plant addiction by simply signing his entire paycheck...
Bill Gates Releases Epstein Island Reading List
To inspire evermore intellectual discourse and transparency about what high-minded topics one of the richest men alive is pondering these days, today Bill Gates...
K-Pod Yacht Hunters Chart with K-Pop Bop ‘Sunken’
To the delight of their adoring fans, this week local K-Pod yacht hunters officially topped the charted Salish Sea waters with their new K-pop...
Six More Months of Wet Season Predicted as Geoduck Squirts All Over His Shadow
This morning local geoduck legend Whidbey Willy emerged from his cozy beachsand burrow and squirted all over his shadow, predicting six more months of...
Museum Employee Keeps Forgetting If They Work at the Henry or the Frye
A local employee of a small Seattle art museum that mostly shows contemporary art admitted this week that they keep mixing up whether they...
