Crazy Socialist Mayor of Seattle Says Cars Not Allowed to Drive on ‘Trains-Only’ Train Tracks
As if Seattle’s crazed socialist mayor hadn’t oppressed the city’s car drivers enough already with new bus-only lanes for her Route 8 stretch limo,...
Blue Origin Goes Rogue, Blows Up Another Billionaire’s Launchpad
For the second night in a row, the team behind Bezos-founded space rocket company Blue Origin has gone rogue by following up their explosion...
Orcas Getting a Little Sick and Tired of Being Asked to Solve All Your Billionaire Problems
After yet another week of hearing humans ask them to sink billionaire yachts for them, today local orca pods announced they’re getting a little...
Millionaires Tax Payers Assured They Only Need to Cut Back on Lattes to Afford Fifth Home
Future Millionaires Tax payers panicked about how they’re ever going to afford their fifth home if they have to one day pay a 9%...
Seattle Mayor Apologizes to Starbucks, Thought It Knew Everyone Here Hated Them Already
After weeks of Starbucks leadership telling every major newspaper in the country how mean Seattle Mayor Katie Wilson’s been to them by publicly not...
Bainbridge Island Adds ‘Everyone Is Welcome Here’ Sign to 90-Foot Wall Keeping Poors Out
In a show of how much better they are than those awful people in Seattle’s Laurelhurst neighborhood, today Bainbridge Island added an “Everyone Is...
Fuck! Starbucks Agrees to All Union Demands and Now We Have to Drink Their Coffee Again
In supposedly fortunate news after years of union-busting, Starbucks suddenly made a 180 and agreed to all of Starbucks Workers United’s union demands, forcing...
Laurelhurst Airlifted One Mile from Seattle Children’s into Lake Washington
To keep Laurelhurst residents from ever having to hear helicopters transporting sick kids directly to the hospital, today the entire community was airlifted to...
$18M Laurelhurst Mansion Owner Just Wishes There Was Some Way to Not Live Next to Noisy Hospital
After people across the nation shamed his neighborhood out of blocking helicopters carrying sick kids from landing at Seattle Children’s, today $18 million waterfront...
Report: Laurelhurst Residents Blocking Helicopter Landings at Seattle Children’s Ain’t Heard Shit Yet
A new report confirmed today that Laurelhurst residents blocking helicopters carrying kids in critical condition from landing directly at Seattle Children’s hospital because they’re...
