Laurelhurst Airlifted One Mile from Seattle Children’s into Lake Washington
To keep Laurelhurst residents from ever having to hear helicopters transporting sick kids directly to the hospital, today the entire community was airlifted to...
$18M Laurelhurst Mansion Owner Just Wishes There Was Some Way to Not Live Next to Noisy Hospital
After people across the nation shamed his neighborhood out of blocking helicopters carrying sick kids from landing at Seattle Children’s, today $18 million waterfront...
Report: Laurelhurst Residents Blocking Helicopter Landings at Seattle Children’s Ain’t Heard Shit Yet
A new report confirmed today that Laurelhurst residents blocking helicopters carrying kids in critical condition from landing directly at Seattle Children’s hospital because they’re...
Mount Baker Station Celebrates Opening of New Park & Ride to Psychiatrist
After years of having absolutely no parking, today Sound Transit’s Mount Baker Station celebrated the opening of its new one-of-a-kind one-stall Park and Ride...
Sun-drunk Seattleite Accidentally Says ‘Hello’ to Stranger
In an embarrassing lapse of character, today a Seattle man who clearly had one too many hours out in the sunshine accidentally said “hello”...
‘White Female Mamdani’ Mayor of Seattle Caught Blowing Taxpayer Money on Personal Limousine
Fury took over the city of Seattle this week after its “White Female Mamdani” mayor, Katie Wilson, was caught blowing precious taxpayer dollars on...
Zuckerberg Docks Annual Salary of 1,400 Laid-Off Meta Workers in Seattle
Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg surprised Seattle Tuesday night when the billionaire unexpectedly docked a massive, five-story annual salary of 1,400 laid-off Meta workers in...
Millionaires Tax Erases Only Advantage of Living in Sad, Barren Wasteland
Today the area’s richest residents and corporations came together on the Seattle Waterfront to announce that the Millionaires Tax—which would make a small fraction...
New Public Bathroom Startup Innovatively Pays People to Regularly Clean, Maintain Them
The City of Seattle has finally opened four new portable public bathroom units in Pioneer Square operated by a startup company that keeps the...
Judge Orders Everyone to Know This Piece of Shit from Covington, Not Seattle
This week a Seattle judge who ordered the man that threw a rock at an endangered monk seal return to Hawaii for court also...
