Duwamish River to Remain Green for St. Patrick’s Day
The EPA and Seattle Department of Ecology announced today that the Duwamish River will stay green for the St. Patrick’s Day holiday, and probably...
Parents Insist It’s Really, Totally Fine Son Chose Evergreen Over UW
In a highly anticipated family Zoom call tonight, local Seattle parents Sam and Bev Mosely insisted it’s actually absolutely fine their son Dan is...
Nazi Knocked Out Cold by Mean Capitol Hill Sticker
In a viral video that's already been shared over a million times in its first 24 hours, a Nazi agitator is seen harassing people...
Seattle Man Sells Out to Big Umbrella
In a shocking move that rattled friends and relatives today, Pacific Northwest native and temperate climate shill Rick Frink caved and bought an umbrella.
“My...
Ha! Local Man Spray Paints Penis On—Oh Shit, That’s a Different EV Brand
Fed up with the excuses people are making for still driving Teslas despite all the shame Elon Musk has brought upon the electric vehicle...
Mayor Harrell Orders Sweeps of Enchantments Campsites
Doubling down on what got him elected in the first place, today Seattle Mayor Bruce Harrell hit his re-election campaign trail with a new...
Green Lake Snowman Absolutely Riddled With Goose Poop
A fanciful frolic through the snow turned messy today after a Green Lake snowman was found to be absolutely riddled with goose poop.
"Oh God,...
Rob Saka Filibusters Own Coffee Order
A line wrapped around the Delridge Uptown Espresso this morning as Seattle City Councilmember Rob Saka held up traffic filibustering his own coffee order."What...
Gold-Chained Gov. Bob Ferguson Goes On Rogan to Explain Why He’s Against Wealth Tax
Today Washington state’s new gold-chained governor, Bob Ferguson, spent his first full day in office on Joe Rogan’s podcast to explain why he’s against...
Negligent Landlord Treats Tenants to In-Unit Polar Plunge
Today tenants of local negligent landlord Roy Nauhart were spared trekking all the way to Alki, Golden Gardens or Matthews Beach after he graciously...
