Nation Almost Kills All Sexist 9-to-5 Bosses in Loving Tribute to Dolly Parton
In a loving tribute to legendary songwriter, actor, business leader and philanthropist Dolly Parton, today the nation came together to almost kill their sexist...
Nation Reminded This Is Last Day You Can Talk About Jimothy
Just in case anyone forgot or has been too busy crocheting the visage of the nation’s favorite short-spined raccoon, today the nation was reminded...
Some Asshole Still Setting Off Blue Angels
Several days after Seafair ended, some asshole is reportedly still setting off Blue Angels over your neighborhood.
“God, I usually try to be understanding of...
Smokey Bear Authorized by NPS to Maul Noncompliant Campers
Underfunded, undermanned and facing the threat of another dire wildfire season in the midst of a global pandemic, a desperate U.S. National Park Service...
Local Woman Just Thinks Flaming Forest Could Find More Peaceful Way to Protest Climate Change
Although she totally believes global warming is an immediate existential threat to many, local woman Sherry Hayes said she thinks forests could protest climate...
Experts Find Smoking Filtered Cigarettes Reduces Risk of Breathing Seattle’s Air
A new public health study out today found that smoking filtered cigarettes significantly reduces the risks of directly inhaling air in Seattle.
“In addition to...
Next Seattle Police Chief Already Fired
Today Mayor Katie Wilson announced she’s already fired Seattle’s next police chief after he somehow teargassed Capitol Hill, deleted public records, hired someone to...
Paleontologists Believe Early Ford Raptor Had Feathers
After years of debate, Washington State University paleontologists believe a fossil just discovered at The Gorge finally proves that the early Ford Raptor did...
New Seahawks Owner Assured He Still Gets to Own 49ers on Game Days
Although he had to sell his 3.1% minority stake in the 49ers in order to buy the Seahawks for a record $9.612 billion, today...
Bumble Bees at Sequim Lavender Festival Baked AF
As is tradition in their annual pilgrammage to celebrate puffing their favorite strain of bud, today bumble bees at the Sequim Lavender Festival by...
