Microsoft Says It Only Enabling Israel’s War Crimes, Not Committing Them
After new reports of how closely the local tech giant works with Israel to surveil and kill thousands of Palestinian civilians, today CEO Satya...
Orcas Offer Food to Humans After Becoming Aware of the Horror That Is the Seattle Hot Dog
Marine mammal researchers at the University of Washington have determined the likely cause for orcas bringing food to boaters is a primal disgust and...
Pod of Orcas Ignored as Ferry Passengers Marvel at Rare Cargo Ship Entering Port of Seattle
Lucky ferry passengers, who were almost too distracted by a pod of orcas breaching in Elliott Bay to notice, caught a rare glimpse today...
Enumclaw Bar Protests Seattle PrideFest with HorseFest
This weekend Enumclaw cowboy bar Ol’ Whips and Chains Watering Hole said it’s countering Seattle’s PrideFest celebration with its first and far more wholesome...
Why a Man Who Pointed a Gun at a Pregnant Woman Over a Parking Spot Is the Transit Hero Seattle Needs
After putting a lot of thought into who we want to endorse for mayor, we here at Transportation for Washington are confident a man...
Mariners Opening Day to Feature ‘Hot Dogs From Hell’ Cannon Fired Directly Into Fan’s Faces
The Seattle Mariners announced plans today to follow up on their popular Hot Dogs from Heaven promotion with a new Hot Dogs from Hell...
No One Knows If Capitol Hill Block Party Lineup Good Except This Chick We Didn’t Feel Cool Enough to Ask
Sources are confirming there’s only one person who knows if the Capitol Hill Block Party lineup that dropped today is any good and, unfortunately...
Gov. Ferguson Breaks Out the Shades for Beautiful Day of Taking Chainsaw to State Budget
Eager to take advantage of the unseasonably warm and sunny weather, today Governor Bob Ferguson broke out the shades and chainsaw to hack the...
Mariners’ Concessions Asking Fans to Round Up At Checkout to Fund New Player
Mariners fans were puzzled at T-Mobile Park concession stands today when they were asked if they wanted to round up at checkout to help...
Rescue Shelter Cats Flown in from California to Seattle Humane Already Complaining About the Mexican Food
Within 24 hours of landing in Seattle, animal shelter workers are confirming that all 19 rescue cats flown in from California are already complaining...
