Local Sleuth Traces Anxiety Attack to Ninth Cup of Coffee
After conducting an investigation so riveting true crime podcasters are already clawing over each other to tell her story, area Detective Benita Collins confirmed...
New Supercharged Light Rail Escalators Launch Passengers Straight From Northgate to Angle Lake
Ahead of the new northside stations opening this summer, today Sound Transit announced that it has upgraded its escalators with a supercharger that will...
Novo Nordisk Unveils New, Stronger Ozempic for Your Mom
Just in time for the holidays, today Novo Nordisk announced a new, stronger Ozempic prescription for that beached whale you call Your Mom.
"We needed...
Seattle Magazine Awarded as Top Source of Information on How to Get Away from Seattle
Today a venerated group of local Seattle tourism media influencers awarded Seattle Magazine the 2024 title for being the area’s top source of information...
Seattleite in Vancouver Launches Formal Investigation into WTF That Is
A Seattle resident visiting Vancouver, B.C this weekend confirmed today that she’ll be launching a formal investigation into whatever the fuck that thing that...
‘Not All Who Wander Are Lost,’ Posts Quarantined Travel Blogger On Awe-Inspiring Trip to Dumpster
Needling travel correspondent Vegan Vagabond is back with a special dispatch from her Capitol Hill apartment complex.
By Vegan Vagabond
The moment the heavy, modern doors...
City Planner Regrets Layout of New Ridgefield Strip Mall
Excitement for Washington state’s first In-N-Out location near Vancouver was deflated today after the Ridgefield City Planner realized the unfortunately suggestive layout of the...
Car-Free Pike Place Market Pilot Deemed Too Successful to Continue
Citing positive feedback and increased foot traffic that grew day after day for a year and a half, next week the car-free Pike Place...
Rescue Shelter Cats Flown in from California to Seattle Humane Already Complaining About the Mexican Food
Within 24 hours of landing in Seattle, animal shelter workers are confirming that all 19 rescue cats flown in from California are already complaining...
Man in Head-to-Toe Carhartt Must Be Heading to Coal Mine After Shift at Vegan Dog Bakery
Customers at a local vegan dog bakery were impressed by the gritty work ethic of one of its Carhartt-clad employees, who everyone assumes must...
