OneBusAway Finally Adds ‘Never’ Notification for When Your Bus Has Fallen into the Void
Today’s new update to the OneBusAway app added a much-requested feature that now lists the arrival time status for buses as “never” whenever they...
Man in Head-to-Toe Carhartt Must Be Heading to Coal Mine After Shift at Vegan Dog Bakery
Customers at a local vegan dog bakery were impressed by the gritty work ethic of one of its Carhartt-clad employees, who everyone assumes must...
SAM Announces SAAAM: Seattle All Appropriated Art Museum
Following the success of the Seattle Art Museum (SAM) and the Seattle Asian Art Museum (SAAM), today administrators were excited to announce the upcoming...
Sound Transit’s New Escher-lators Broken in Three Different Planes of Existence
Sound Transit’s rollout of their new multi-directional conveyance system was spoiled today after its newly installed escher-lators already broke down in three different planes...
State Parks Stages Intervention After New Smokey Bear Poster Warns ‘Only You Can Get Me Some More Cocaine’
Today Washington State Parks in collaboration with the Department of Natural Resources announced they had to stage an intervention for beloved fire prevention spokesman...
Frigid Seattle Weather Forces Mardi Gras Partiers to Only Flash Arc’teryx Base Layers
Fat Tuesday’s cold February weather forced dozens of Seattle Mardi Gras revelers to settle for only flashing their Arc-teryx mid and base layers at...
Living Presidents Celebrate Presidents’ Day with White Elephant Classified Document Exchange
The Presidents’ Day spirit was alive and well today as all six living U.S. presidents gathered together at a secure location this afternoon to...
Google Nest Outside of Ballard Home Captures 400+ Rabid Raccoon Selfies
This week a local Ballard couple who installed a Google Nest cam to make their home safer discovered it had instead mostly just become...
Chiefs’ Racist Fan Traditions Successfully Offset by NFL Renaming Super Bowl Stadium ‘Indigenous Pledge Arena’
After years of the Chiefs franchise culturally appropriating Native American/Indigenous traditions without their permission, today the NFL said it was glad to announce the...
Male Orca? This Man Is Only Still Alive Because His Mother Feeds Him Salmon Every Day
A recent scientific report confirming that male southern resident orcas stay completely dependent on their mothers feeding them for their entire life has some...
