Tacoma PD Claims Officer ‘Feared for New Paint Job’ Before Plowing Car Into Crowd
Although videos of a Tacoma police officer ramming his cruiser through a crowd over the weekend look and sound disturbing, local police union president...
Quarantine Haircut Qualifies as Both Self-care and Self-harm
Wellness gurus across the nation are now confirming that quarantine self-haircuts have officially joined body waxing, nose hair plucking and literally anything Gwyneth Paltrow...
Georgia Senator Raphael Warnock Promises to Keep Insatiable Chris Ballew from Moving to the Country, Eating All the Peaches
In his first statement after winning re-election in a Georgia runoff Tuesday night, Senator Raphael Warnock announced he's recommitting to doing anything possible to...
CDC Study Determines Not Enough Sage or Bleach on Earth to Decontaminate White House
The CDC just released the results of its latest study confirming what many had already suspected: There is not enough sage or bleach on...
Nation Confused as Trump Pardons Betty White
Images of Betty White all over social media this morning were met with a mix of relief and confusion as news reports confirmed she...
CEO Assures MLK Would Have Wanted You to Work Today
In and inspiring e-mail to staff who mandatorily worked on Martin Luther King Jr. Day, CEO of local tech firm HustleCorps assured his employees...
Anxious DC Residents Breathe Sigh of Relief as Twisted Tea Semi Arrives at Capitol
A week after a violent mob sieged Congress, tense DC locals looked visibly relieved tonight as the Twisted Tea semi finally arrived at the...
SPD Officers at DC Capitol Riot Placed on Paid Administrative Leave to Riot White House
Interim Seattle Police Chief Adrian Diaz has swiftly reprimanded several Seattle police officers who attended the Capitol riots in Washington, D.C. last week with...
Gov. Inslee Updates COVID Guidelines to Mandate Aaron Donald Must Stay 6 Feet From Russell Wilson
Ahead of today’s wild-card matchup between the Seattle Seahawks and the Los Angeles Rams, Governor Jay Inslee made a surprise announcement that he would...
December 2020 Refuses to Concede to January 2021
After President Donald Trump finally gave what was essentially a long-awaited concession speech Thursday night, the nation remains in limbo today as December 2020...
