After Reopening Alcatraz, Trump Pledges to ‘Fire Up the Pipes’ at Seattle’s Gas Works Park
Still riding high off his decision to reopen Alcatraz, President Donald Trump has now set his sights on Seattle’s Gas Works Park, pledging to...
White Smoke Billowing Out of City Hall Just Rob Saka’s Brain Overheating Thinking About Traffic Medians
Fire officials say the pillars of white smoke billowing out of City Hall is actually just steam shooting out of Seattle City Councilmember Rob...
Tragedy Strikes After RFK Jr. Vaccinated By Lone Doctor on Grassy Knoll
Tragedy struck today after Health Secretary Robert Kennedy Jr. was reportedly vaccinated by a lone doctor wielding a long-range syringe from a nearby grassy...
Raccoon Mortified to Learn He Took Date to Rummage Through Cybertruck Instead of Dumpster
A local raccoon was reportedly mortified today after realizing he accidentally took his Foragr date to rummage through a Cybertruck instead of a dumpster.
"I...
Local WhatsApp Group Alerts You Whenever Everybody in City Saw the Orcas Except You
Word is spreading that there is a nifty, new WhatsApp Group that sends detailed notifications whenever everybody else in Seattle saw the orcas swim...
Spokane Admits It Keeps the ‘e’ Because It Hates Itself Too
After years of people speculating about why the Eastern Washington city of Spokane spells its name in a way that inevitably gets it constantly...
Pratt Fine Arts Center Asked to Cancel DIY Classes or Risk Losing Federal Funding
Today Seattle’s Pratt Fine Arts Center became the next educational institution threatened with federal funding cuts by the Trump administration after someone reported them...
Gov. Ferguson Breaks Out the Shades for Beautiful Day of Taking Chainsaw to State Budget
Eager to take advantage of the unseasonably warm and sunny weather, today Governor Bob Ferguson broke out the shades and chainsaw to hack the...
New DSA Member Wondering When Downtown Seattle Association Started Hating Capitalism So Much
After attending his first meeting today, new DSA member Troy Haskell said he couldn’t help but wonder when the Downtown Seattle Association started hating...
Mayor Harrell Deploys Denny Blaine Money Shot Spotter
Following through on a promise months ago to build “public masturbation deterrent infrastructure” at Denny Blaine Park, today Seattle Mayor Bruce Harrell installed a...
