US to Only Allow Iran at World Cup Games If No Dangerous School Children on Team
After a week of deliberating if Iran’s national soccer team will be able to attend their scheduled World Cup Games in Seattle and LA...
Mount Adams Blames Extra Seismic Activity on Upstairs Neighbors
Although scientists from the U.S. Geological Survey have observed a sustained spike in seismic activity from Mount Adams recently including quakes three days in...
Leavenworth Cabin Renters Now Contractually Obligated to Live, Laugh and/or Love
After a rough winter for everyone, one AirBnb host is contractually requiring their Leavenworth cabin renters to Live, Laugh and/or Love or else pay...
SPD Asks for Special Chair to Sit in If They Have to Just Watch ICE Brutalize People
Upset that they’re not allowed to help ICE agents violate people’s constitutional rights—only document them doing it—today Seattle Police Department officers asked Mayor Katie...
Six More Months of Wet Season Predicted as Geoduck Squirts All Over His Shadow
This morning local geoduck legend Whidbey Willy emerged from his cozy beachsand burrow and squirted all over his shadow, predicting six more months of...
Museum Employee Keeps Forgetting If They Work at the Henry or the Frye
A local employee of a small Seattle art museum that mostly shows contemporary art admitted this week that they keep mixing up whether they...
Reverse Art Thieves Won’t Stop Adding Paintings to Frye Art Museum
First Hill's Frye Art Museum is reaching out to the community for help dealing with reverse art thieves who won't stop adding new paintings...
Franz Debuts Budget-friendly ‘Some of the Things’ Bagels
Attempting to address the rising cost of groceries, today Franz Bakery announced its new cost-saving "Some of the Things" bagel."We've listened to the feedback...
Kristi Noem Fired After Attempting to Buy, Wear Seattle Hat ‘n’ Boots
President Donald Trump fired Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem today after discovering she had not only blown more than $200 million on...
Southern Resident Conservation Groups Against More Affordable Housing Just Assuming Orcas Also Racist
Assuming Southern Residents are just as afraid of living next to more coloreds and poors as they are, today a coalition of orca-loving conservatives...
