Heroic Coworker Spares Team Happy Hour of Plans to Backpack The Enchantments This Weekend
An entire marketing department was rescued from a long, excruciating physical and psychological horror today at a Downtown Yard House happy hour when a heroic...
Mariners Spotted Having Steamy Summer Fling with Winning
Move over Bennifer: Several witnesses are reporting that what initially seemed at best a one-night stand or crazy weekend on the road between the...
New Family Friendly Brewery To Lock Kids In Padded Room While Parents Get Shithoused
In a move that has local parents raving, the owner of Enfant Terrible Brewing has announced that its new Greenwood location provides a padded,...
Majestic Lake Washington Bald Eagle Shits on Car
A lone bald eagle glided across the still waters of Lake Washington and swooped through the tall Seward Park spruces this afternoon before unleashing...
All Clever IPA Names Tapped Out
Upstart Georgetown brewery owners Steve and Greg Ward were left high and dry today when they learned that all clever hop-based IPA puns had...
34% of Local Billionaires Report Living Paycheck-to-Paycheck
In yet another sign of economic downturn, a recent report shows 34 percent of Seattle billionaires are currently living paycheck-to-paycheck.
“If things don’t improve soon,...
Only Anti-Choice King County Councilmember Still Kinda Hoping Only Local Right-Wing Nutjobs Know Who He Is
As local pro-choice advocates protest the dismantling of national human rights to privacy and bodily autonomy while continuing to look for productive ways to...
Local Dad Overdoses on Gifted Smoked Salmon Boxes
What was supposed to be a joyous day of puns and sensible car recommendations took a scary turn as local father Michael Chrisman overdosed...
Cold Weather Leads to First G-Rated Fremont Solstice Parade
Families rejoiced today as the cold, overcast June weather turned the Fremont Solstice Parade into its first G-Rated, genitalia-free version of the treasured annual...
Landlord Requiring $500 Deposit for Sleep Paralysis Demon
With rents skyrocketing and housing inventory shrinking, area landlords have reportedly decided to expand pet rent surcharges to now include a $500 deposit for...
