Mayor Harrell Sweeps Wheedle Off the Needle
To remind his biggest supporters of what he does best a week before the Nov. 4 general election, today incumbent Seattle Mayor Bruce Harrell...
East Bezos Ball Demolished to Make Way for More Ball Room
Saying it was high time to create more space to breathe in such a crowded area, this week Amazon unexpectedly funded the total demolition...
Spoiled Mariners Fan Wanted AL Pennant Too
Sources are confirming that one local spoiled Mariners fan is upset the team is only going to be AL West Division Champions this year...
Family Not Sure What to Do with Other Trees in Costco Christmas 6-Pack
After getting a great Christmas tree deal at Costco and decorating one at home today, one local family admitted they were struggling with what...
Capitol Hill Station Finally Opens Public Bathroom
After years of popular demand, today Sound Transit finally opened a public bathroom at its Capitol Hill light rail station located just above its...
Novo Nordisk Unveils New, Stronger Ozempic for Your Mom
Just in time for the holidays, today Novo Nordisk announced a new, stronger Ozempic prescription for that beached whale you call Your Mom.
"We needed...
ICE Detains Leaves as They Turn Brown
ICE confirmed today that its agents are in fact now waiting at the base of trees to zip-tie leaves in bags the moment they...
Masked ICE Agents Infiltrate Portland Emergency Naked Bike Ride Protest
Temporarily trading in gaiters for gimp masks, several ICE agents reportedly infiltrated Portland’s Emergency Naked Bike Ride Protest on Sunday to see if they...
Group of Mountain Climbers Dies on Mountain Everyone Dies On
Today search and rescue teams tragically confirmed that an entire group of mountain climbers died on the mountain everyone dies on.
“They were so excited...
Family Finds Little Free Library Under Their Eaves
Today a Wedgwood household discovered the source of several recent book attacks was a little free library that had sprouted on the underside of...
