‘Holiday Family Runaway 5K’ Participants Turn to Bitter Cold to Escape Loving Family
In what has become an annual Seward
Park tradition, a group of die-hard holiday fun runners have once again turned
to the bitter winter cold to...
Stuck-Up Coworker Wearing Dress, Motherfucking Heels
Despite unwritten Pacific Northwest fashion laws against putting obvious effort into an outfit for any reason other than hiking, biking or barista-ing, local coworker...
OSHA Announces Mistletoe Buyback Program in Exchange for Sexual Harassment Training
Recognizing the hazards of mistletoe in office settings, OSHA has formed a special task force for a no-questions-asked buyback program to get this dangerous...
Benaroya Hall Debuts Halloween ‘Sounds of Horror’ Series with Nickelbachmaninoff Symphony No. 2
Benaroya Hall's spooky foray into the macabre via its brand-new Halloween ‘Sounds of Horror’ series kicked off last night with the premier of Nickelbachmaninoff...
Ghost of Christmas Future On Floor Gently Rocking Self Back and Forth After Visiting Jeff Bezos
One of the Ghost of Christmas Future’s customary visits to a wealth-hoarding tycoon ended abruptly this morning after a brief glimpse into Jeff Bezos’...
Boeing Promises New 737 AXE Line Is ‘Legit, Hella Safe’
In a surprise press conference this afternoon, Boeing executives
revealed a new set of airliners dubbed the 737 AXE, adamantly emphasizing that
they are “legit” and...
Mike O’Brien to Cap Seattle City Council Term with Week-Long Fossil Fuel Bender
After a 10-year run that included biking to work and kayak-blocking Shell’s arctic oil rig, outgoing Seattle City Councilmember Mike O’Brien confirmed at his...
Santa Going Green with Sound Transit, Promises Presents By July
Bowing to pressure from the Elf Liberation Front, Santa announced today that Christmas is going extra green this year in the Seattle area with...
Burke Museum Unveils New Giraffe Skeleton in Ominous ‘5 to 10 Years, Tops’ Exhibit
Following a long renovation, the Burke Museum re-opened its doors earlier this month with a host of new features and exhibits. The beloved natural...
Judd Apatow Casts Mariners in Upcoming Flick ‘The 42-Year-Old Virgins’
Comedy film and TV producer Judd Apatow of “Knocked Up” and “Freaks and Geeks” fame missed no time at all in casting the Seattle Mariners for his next...
