Local Historian Records Momentous Event for Future Generations
For the tenth year almost in a row, local historian Greg Keith spent New Year’s recording the Space Needle’s fireworks show with his iPhone,...
Rash of Starbucks Closures Leave Locals Unsure of Where They Can Say They Would Never Get Coffee
With Starbucks closing numerous locations throughout Seattle, including the first that voted to unionize on Dec. 9, an increasing number of local coffee snobs...
Man Trapped Inside Flaming Tesla Clearly Pathetic Attempt to Get Elon Musk’s Attention
Experts are confirming that a man who was trapped inside his flaming Tesla today after an alleged self-driving malfunction was clearly just the latest...
Seattle Riots After Ticketmaster Immediately Sells Out of All Queen Anne Sedan Snow Slam Tickets
Hatred for Ticketmaster reached its highest levels yet today as thousands of avid Queen Anne Sedan Snow Slam fans struggled all day to get...
Seattle Parks Says Fuck It, All Parks Are Dog Parks
Today Seattle Parks and Recreation announced its new “You Know What? Fuck It” policy permanently designating all city-owned parks as off-leash dog parks.
“Most park...
Amazon Prime Air Develops First Remote-Control Drone That Doesn’t Break By End of Christmas Day
Determined to be at the forefront of remote-control drone technology, today Amazon’s Prime Air team announced its engineers have finally successfully created the first...
Joe Kent, Loren Culp Refuse to Concede Ugly Christmas Sweater Competition
Chaos erupted at an Olympia holiday party tonight when former Washington gubernatorial Republican candidate Loren Culp and recently unsuccessful Republican Washington State Representative candidate...
Gas Works Park Sledder Suddenly Becomes Lake Union Kayaker
In an amphibious feat the likes of which Seattle snow lovers had never yet seen, today one man sledding at Gas Works Park suddenly...
Area Man Drives into Ditch to Practice for Upcoming Winter Driving Season
To prepare for snow arriving in the Seattle area as soon as next week, today one local winter driving aficionado took advantage of the...
Tofurky Petting Zoo Opens at Woodland Park Zoo
Appealing to a growing number of vegan and vegetarian families, today Woodland Park Zoo hosted its first Thanksgiving Day tofurky petting zoo to wide...
