Grindr Crashes During Fleet Week
As sailors disembarked their ships for Fleet Week in Seattle after months at sea, Grindr immediately crashed, initiating a call for emergency hookup networks.
“I...
Opponents of Denny Blaine Nude Beach Propose DeGenitalized Zone
After failing to construct a playground intended to disrupt the historically queer nude beach at Denny Blaine Park and then failing to have the...
‘Military Parades Are Dumb,’ Says Seattleite Who Can’t Wait for Seafair
Blowing millions of dollars on a military parade on the president’s birthday was a dumb waste of money according to one local man who...
‘I’ll Go to Jail to Protect Seattle,’ Says Seattle Police Chief Arresting Self
In an unprecedented moment of self-sacrificial public service, today Seattle Police Department Chief Shon Barnes said he would go to jail to protect Seattle...
Scientists Discover First Law of Motion Does Not Apply to Route 8 Buses
As many have suspected after years of studying why it’s so hard to get King County Metro Route 8 buses—aka "The L8"—to reach any...
Councilmember Cathy Moore Steps Down to Spend More Time at Home Lowering Ethics Standards of Family
After wide public criticism of her bill that would have eliminated a financial conflict of interest ethics law, today Seattle City Councilmember Cathy Moore...
Geologists: Mount Rainier Will Not Erupt During Your Lifetime, with Possible Exception of Very End
Washington state geologists confirmed today that, according to their most recent research study, Mount Rainier definitely won’t erupt at any point during your lifetime,...
Phew! City Always Has Enough Seattle Police Officers Around to Harass Queer Community
Despite years of citing severe staffing shortages as the reason Seattle police can’t respond fast enough or at all to many serious crimes, today...
Bruce Harrell Endorsers Encouraged to Blink Twice If They Need Help
Surprised to see progressive names like Teresa Mosqueda, Pramila Jayapal and Claudia Balducci openly supporting the re-election of a man repeatedly credibly accused of...
Nice! Blue State Governor Who Isn’t Going to End Slavery in Prisons Celebrates Juneteenth
Unlike a bunch of racist MAGA governors of deep red states, Washington state residents rejoiced Thursday in having a blue-state governor like Bob Ferguson...
