Seattleite Emerges from Winter Cocoon as Anti-Social Butterfly
One local Seattleite reportedly emerged from his weighted-blanket chrysalis today and spread his wings as an anti-social butterfly.
"After six long months of winter isolation,...
Microsoft Admits Its AI Is Just Clippy on Shrooms
After years of trying to convince people its various attempts at artificial intelligence software are on the cutting edge of innovation, today Microsoft admitted...
Man Who Told Transplants in the 90s That Seattleites Don’t Use Umbrellas Never Meant for Things to Get This Far
Today born-and-bred Seattle native Hank Sanderson confessed that when he told transplants back in the nineties that real Seattleites don’t use umbrellas, he never...
Couple Who Joined Rock Climbing Gym Wondering If They Can Just Do the Swinging and Orgies Part
Today one local couple who excitedly signed up for Vertical World said they were wondering if they could just do the swinging and orgies...
Pink Pony Club? These Cherry Blossoms Keep Flashing Everyone Their Petals
In what some are calling Seattle’s own Pink Pony Club, crowds of cherry blossoms right in the UW Quad are reportedly flashing everyone their...
Op-ed: Californians Need to Go Back Where They Came From (Except for Eddie Vedder—He’s One of the Good Ones)
By Don Cudd, Seattle Culture Columnist
We all know Seattle is the home of political correctness and
celebrated diversity efforts that are the ultimate panacea for...
Man Irritated by Pride Month Excited to Celebrate 1/37th Irish Heritage
Today one local man took a break from his usual dislike of bright colors and bold celebrations of community pride, especially in June, to...
Uncontacted Tribe of Mall Santas Discovered in Abandoned Pacific Place Mall
The local scientific community is buzzing today following the discovery of an uncontacted tribe of Mall Santas living inside the abandoned Pacific Place Mall.
"It's...
High-Powered New Leaf Blower Moves 6 Whole Wet Leaves a Minute
Just in time for the late fall season’s soggiest and most stubborn damp leaves, an innovative, high-powered new leaf blower that just hit the...
Macramé Barricades Spring Up at Urban Craft Uprising
Radical vendors armed with hot glue guns erected barricades of knotted hemp macramé at Seattle Center today in yet another Urban Craft Uprising.
“We have...
