This Day in Seattle History: Denny Party Sticks Chewing Gum on Rock to Mark Arrival
It was on this day in November 13, 1851 that the Denny Party famously announced their arrival to the Puget Sound region by sticking a piece of chewing gum on a rock, marking the...
Fired Seattle Police Chief Adrian Diaz Just Wondering If He Still Has to Pretend He’s Gay
Since it didn’t keep him from getting fired this week for hiring a woman he was having an affair with amid several other accusations of sexually inappropriate behavior towards women at work, former Seattle...
Martin Selig Evicts Three Ghosts Sent to Teach Him a Lesson About Christmas
Local real estate mogul Martin Selig reportedly kicked three supernatural visitors to the curb early today after the ghosts attempted to teach him a lesson about the true meaning of Christmas.
"Oh great, another ghostly...
Poll Shows Seattleites Actually Wouldn’t Mind If 8 Drooling Zombies on City Council Asked for Brains
A new poll out today revealed a majority of Seattle residents actually wouldn’t mind if the eight drooling zombies on the City Council asked for brains.
“I know I’m supposed to be scared of zombies,...
Cash-Strapped Renter Actually Pretty Stoked About Free Eggs and Toilet Paper Thrown at House
With rents rising and grocery prices soaring, one local man was quietly thrilled after his house was vandalized with eggs and toilet paper during the Halloween season.
“I used to be pissed when the neighborhood...
5-Agency Task Force Wraps Up 5-Month Investigation with Arrest of Detergent Thief
A five-month man hunt—which involved unprecedented collaboration between five separate local, county, state and federal law enforcement agencies’ top detectives and only half of the city’s $15 million major investigations budget—has finally led to...
Council Carves Out Exception for Prostituting Yourself to Big Business
After wide public criticism of recent legislation that criminalizes sex workers again instead of just their pimps and johns, today the conservative majority Seattle City Council relaxed its rules to allow for prostituting yourself...
SPS Warns Parents That Students with School Lunch Debt Will Be Forced to Face Off in Hunger Games
In a districtwide email titled “New Student Meal Debt Policy,” Seattle Public Schools informed parents that any student with school lunch debt will be forced to face off in a round of the Hunger...
Ample White Space on Candidate’s Yard Signs Demonstrates Love of Community Input
In a testament to how much the Seattle City Councilmember and homeless shelter-fighting landlord who just proposed the idea of no-protest zones this week loves community input, citywide Council seat candidate Tanya Woo has...
Parents Mortified as Kids Turn Elf on the Shelf Into Snitch in the Ditch
A pair of Seattle parents awoke to an alarming scene today when they discovered the festive Elf on the Shelf perched on their fireplace mantle had been reduced to a "Snitch in the Ditch"...
