Woman’s Love Triangle Between Boyfriend and Geoduck Turns Tragic
One woman’s love triangle between her boyfriend and a geoduck she met on a Port Townsend beach last summer came to a tragic end at the couple’s kitchen table in Edmonds this evening.
Tiffany...
Man Smoking Outside Cafe Warns Against Eating Meat
Puffing Winston Lights as he leaned back in the chair of a Capitol Hill cafe’s outdoor patio, local yoga instructor Mark Roeman educated his brother-in-law today on the multitude of benefits a meat-free lifestyle...
Tech Company Can’t Have Any More Cocoa Puffs Until It Finishes All the Raisin Bran
Heads butted today in South Lake Union as local tech company staff was informed that it has to eat all of its Raisin Bran before it can order any more Cocoa Puffs for their...
Twin Peaks Fan Pretends to Not Be Disappointed with Actual Double R Diner
Twin Peaks devotee Craig Peterson heroically mustered enough strength Wednesday to conceal the cavernous expectation gap between the show’s Double R Diner and the reality of the fictional restaurant’s North Bend setting at Twede’s...
Cranky Mom On Vacation Actually Did Have Sand In Vagina
Doctors have successfully removed a record two pounds of glistening white sand from a Seattle woman after she returned from her family vacation to Mexico.
For two weeks, Seattle mother Celine Jefferson’s attempts to tell...
Minnesota Dad Unconvinced That Seattle Isn’t on the Coast
Despite pleadings from a son who has lived in Seattle for more than a decade, Minnesota father of five Tim Edwards remains resolute in his findings that the city of Seattle lies on the...
Seattle Coffee Shops Thrust Back at Starbucks Porn Ban
A collective of independent coffee shops in Seattle are firing back at Starbucks’ plan to ban pornography from their in-store wifi, offering customers the kind of double-dicking, elbow-deep, all-anal action that leaves absolutely nothing...
Seattle Man Uses Fridge Light To Treat Seasonal Affective Disorder
In a desperate bid to treat his Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) without actually leaving the house, Beacon Hill resident Seth Jones has begun treating the crushing despondency that comes with Seattle's rainy season gloom...
Californian Denounces Perfectly Fine Mexican Restaurant
California native Rhea Larkin made waves today as she took to social media to denounce a perfectly fine Mexican restaurant in Ballard.
“These have to be the worst tacos I’ve ever had,” she wrote in...
Tacoma Traffic Jam Still Coolest Thing To Do In Tacoma
Dozens of drivers put their vehicles in park during Saturday's completely stalled traffic on I-5 to celebrate what is still widely hailed as the coolest thing to do in Tacoma: Traffic Jam.
“Everybody’s hanging...