Rescue Shelter Cats Flown in from California to Seattle Humane Already Complaining About the Mexican Food
Within 24 hours of landing in Seattle, animal shelter workers are confirming that all 19 rescue cats flown in from California are already complaining about the Mexican food here.
“You know how transplants are: Even...
SeaTac’s ‘No Parking on Airport Road’ Signs Officially Declared a Must-Stop Attraction
This holiday season, skip Zoolights and head to SeaTac’s airport road, where drivers are dazzling onlookers in a festive display of hazard lights, abrupt turns, and bold violations of local ordinances.
“It’s like watching a...
Gingerbread House Day Sparks Discussions Around the Very Real Issue of Gingerfrication
While everyone loves Gingerbread House Day, this year the holiday is sparking conversations about whether it’s too problematic to celebrate due to the very real and ongoing issue of gingerfrication.
“This is serious, man: One...
Luna Park Cafe Implicated in Fonzi Scheme
Popular West Seattle diner and tchotchke paradise Luna Park Cafe had their malt mixer impounded today as they are currently under investigation for running an illegal Fonzi scheme."Luna Park came under our radar during...
The Needling’s Top 10 Boeing Headlines of 2024
What a year for Boeing! The Needling wrote about Boeing literally ten times as much as it has any other year with almost 30 headlines about the local commercial plane manufacturing monopoly. We had...
Danish Cookie Tin Enjoys Final Moments of Not Carrying Sewing Supplies
Today one local Royal Dansk tin resting in a spread of Thanksgiving desserts with just a few Danish butter cookies left in its paper cups shared gratitude for its final moments of not carrying...
Two-Drink Limit Imposed After Knitting Needle Fight at New Capitol Hill Crochet & Coffee Café
A new two-drink coffee limit will be enforced starting this week at Capitol Hill's new crochet and coffee spot after an overcaffeinated patron snatched a knitting needle from another woman’s corgi dog sweater project...
Bezos Travels to Amazon Rainforest to Search for Endangered Birds to Stuff Inside Turducken
Not satisfied with a level of decadence that would instantly kill a medieval peasant, Jeff Bezos reportedly traveled to the Amazon rainforest today in search of new endangered birds to stuff inside his Turducken...
SPD Officer Instinctively Turns Off Body Cam Before Approaching Dark Turkey Meat
Today one Seattle police officer nearly ruined Thanksgiving after he instinctively turned off his body camera and reached for his sidearm while approaching the turkey's dark meat.
"Hey, pal, wings where I can see them–I...
Dog Scientists Recommend Leaving Thanksgiving Turkey Unattended for 5 Minutes
As the nation prepares for Thanksgiving festivities, a panel of dog scientists released an official statement today recommending that you should leave the turkey completely unattended for the next five minutes while you go...
