Costco Launches New Kirkland Signature Branded Poppers For Pride Month
This week Costco left other companies celebrating Pride Month-themed products in the dust with the launch of its new wholesale line of cheeseball tub-sized Kirkland Signature-branded poppers.
“Here at Costco, we do more than pay...
Couple Brings Golden Retriever to Wrong Puppy Play Meetup
A local couple apologized today after bringing their golden retriever, Benji, to what they quickly realized was the wrong puppy play meetup in Capitol Hill when their pup was the only one with real...
Tired of Shark Week Typecasting, Sharks Demand More Romantic Lead Roles
Fed up with the stereotyping perpetuated by popular entertainment like Shark Week, today a coalition of sharks demanded being given more romantic lead roles.
“All the good roles go to the dolphins, orcas and other...
Houseboat Is Neither
Today local real estate agent Chelsea Perkins invited people looking to purchase both a house and boat to check out an adorable Eastlake houseboat, which is neither.
“If you’re looking for a cozy, stable home...
Man Comes Out As Bellevue Resident
After years of keeping who he truly is in hiding, today 33-year-old Tristan Scraggs officially came out to his Seattle friends and family as a resident of Bellevue.
“All those times I said I couldn’t...
Slut Shaming? My Dog Bit the Mailman While He Was Wearing Those Hot Little Shorts
One man was left mortified today after his dog slut-shamed his local mail carrier while he was delivering the mail in those hot little short-shorts.
“The mailman was strutting down my driveway wearing those cute...
Man Terrified New Friend Will Invite Him to Improv Show
After achieving the impossible dream of making a new friend as an adult, one local man confessed today that his desire for a new buddy has been completely replaced by a deep fear he...
Lincoln Park Wildlife Was Actually Really Looking Forward to Those Pickleball Courts
After a group of West Seattleites recently won their months-long battle to keep Seattle Parks from constructing new pickleball courts in Lincoln Park because of the negative impact the noisy sport could have on...
Pearl Jam Album Played Backwards Contains English Language
While searching for subliminal satanic commands, a young Spokane teenager was surprised to instead find discernible English words when playing Pearl Jam’s Yellow Ledbetter in reverse, his mortified mother reported.
The teen’s mother, Susan Willet,...
Bing Still Pretty Sure Millions of Former Google Search Engine Users Should Be Showing Up Any Time Now
After Google’s launch of its laughably inaccurate AI Overviews went so badly last week that users began checking out other search engines for the first time in years, local search engine Microsoft Bing said...
