Amazon Compromises, Allows Employees Working in Office 5 Days a Week 2 Work-from-Home Days on Weekend
After a national outcry from thousands of employees wondering why Amazon won’t allow hybrid work schedules anymore for anyone outside the C-suite, today CEO Andy Jassy announced a compromise that will allow people to...
OKCupid Seattle Scene Now Exclusively Exes and Exes of Exes
OKCupid (OKC) announced this afternoon that its Seattle subscribers will now be matched exclusively with their exes.
“We realized one of the main motivations of our customer base was to make a profile just to...
Return-to-Office Order Obviously Just Layoff without Severance
This week thousands of local workers received a return-to-office five days a week notice via an e-mail from Amazon that was obviously just a layoff without severance or unemployment benefits.
“Look, as one of their...
Portland Hipsters Become Republican to Keep Portland Weird
Ever committed to their “Keep Portland Weird” vows, this week all of Portland, Oregon’s hipsters accepted the new reality of what it now means to be “weird” by becoming far-right Republicans.
“Keeping Portland Weird isn’t...
Scarecrow Video Auctions Off Director’s Cut of Zapruder Film
As part of the Save Our Scarecrow fundraising campaign, Seattle's last video store has made the difficult Hail Mary-decision to auction off its rare director's cut of the Zapruder film."This is the holy grail...
Home Depot Unveils New Line of Succulents That Only Need Water Every Other Weekend for Divorced Plant Daddies
In an effort to cater to their growing divorced plant-daddy demo, today Home Depot announced a new line of “Split-Custody Cacti” that only require water every other weekend.
“Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce,...
Capitol Hill Block Party Gives Annual Reminder to Residents Over 40 That It Is Time to Move to Ballard
Like salmon answering nature’s call to suddenly swim upstream to a new body of water, this weekend countless residents in their 40s were reminded by three back-to-back days of live Capitol Hill Block Party...
Dave Matthews Sees Shadow at The Gorge, Predicts 6 More Weeks of Summer
Thousands converged upon The Gorge Labor Day Weekend for their annual pilgrimage to see if singer Dave Matthews would see his shadow—and he did, predicting six more weeks of summer!
"It sometimes takes all...
PAX West Attendees Devoured by GameShark
Today tragedy struck PAX West, the largest gaming convention on the West Coast, when a number of attendees were devoured by GameShark."I don't know how to put it into words—all I can say is...
Fall Bitches Already Fondly Gazing at Summer’s Sweet Demise
An entire month before the first day of autumn, the Pacific Northwest’s most cinnamon-popping, gourd-decorating fall bitches are reportedly already smiling at the crisp, graying sky outside as they note every detail of summer’s...
