Scalper Bots Trample Consumers During Cyber Monday Sale
Once thought to be an escape from the bloodthirsty mayhem of Black Friday sales, countless Cyber Monday sale shoppers across Seattle say they were...
Op-ed: I’m Gretchen Wieners and, Yes, I’m Still Trying to Make ‘Uptown’ Happen
Look, I know I’m a transplant and that my opinion as the daughter of the inventor of Toaster Strudel may not mean as much...
Man Worried All-Gender Bathroom Not Safe for Women Now That He’s In It
Today one brave, selfless man using an all-gender bathroom for the first time expressed concern for the safety of women now that he was...
Mythological Sirens Pivot to Self-Help Podcasts to Lure Men to Watery Graves
While tales of mythological sirens captivating sailors with their seductive songs have long been told, the cryptids have reportedly pivoted to podcasts to lure...
City Council Shows Well-fed Pigs at State Fair
After spending all year diligently fattening them up on retroactive 23% raises plus bonuses, this month the majority of the Seattle City Council are...
Spawning Humans Return to Auburn to Breed and Then Slowly Die
As seasons change and nature takes its course, it’s that bittersweet time of year again when spawning humans begin returning to Auburn to breed...
Millennial Parent at Trunk or Treat Can’t Help But Feel Weird Telling Kid to Take Candy From Stranger in Van
One local millennial parent was struggling to adjust to new Halloween ‘Trunk or Treat’ traditions after years of being told to never take candy...
Rain Brings Wild Couch Hunting Season to a Close
As the taut, frost-bitten nips of winter inch closer and closer to the Emerald City with torrential bouts of rain, local furniture foragers are...
Fair Organizers Assure Public Carnival Rides Not Made by Boeing
After hearing rumors that some people think carnival rides aren’t safe, today ride operators at the Washington State Fair in Puyallup assured the public...
Amazon Compromises, Allows Employees Working in Office 5 Days a Week 2 Work-from-Home Days on Weekend
After a national outcry from thousands of employees wondering why Amazon won’t allow hybrid work schedules anymore for anyone outside the C-suite, today CEO...
