Leaf Starting to Think He’s Only One in City Not Getting Blown
After weeks of hearing it happen to just about every other leaf in the city, one local fallen leaf still on the ground by...
5 Creative Ways to Come Out As Straight and Monogamous in Seattle on National Coming Out Day
Coming out is hard, especially when you have no idea how your Seattle queer and/or poly friends will react to you admitting you’re a...
Netflix Fireplace Left Unattended Burns Through 300 Hours of Nature Documentaries
A local family returning from vacation this week was left astonished when they discovered an unattended Netflix fireplace in their living room had burned...
Scalper Bots Trample Consumers During Cyber Monday Sale
Once thought to be an escape from the bloodthirsty mayhem of Black Friday sales, countless Cyber Monday sale shoppers across Seattle say they were...
Op-ed: I’m Gretchen Wieners and, Yes, I’m Still Trying to Make ‘Uptown’ Happen
Look, I know I’m a transplant and that my opinion as the daughter of the inventor of Toaster Strudel may not mean as much...
Man Worried All-Gender Bathroom Not Safe for Women Now That He’s In It
Today one brave, selfless man using an all-gender bathroom for the first time expressed concern for the safety of women now that he was...
Mythological Sirens Pivot to Self-Help Podcasts to Lure Men to Watery Graves
While tales of mythological sirens captivating sailors with their seductive songs have long been told, the cryptids have reportedly pivoted to podcasts to lure...
City Council Shows Well-fed Pigs at State Fair
After spending all year diligently fattening them up on retroactive 23% raises plus bonuses, this month the majority of the Seattle City Council are...
Spawning Humans Return to Auburn to Breed and Then Slowly Die
As seasons change and nature takes its course, it’s that bittersweet time of year again when spawning humans begin returning to Auburn to breed...
Millennial Parent at Trunk or Treat Can’t Help But Feel Weird Telling Kid to Take Candy From Stranger in Van
One local millennial parent was struggling to adjust to new Halloween ‘Trunk or Treat’ traditions after years of being told to never take candy...
