Elon Musk Taps Russell Wilson to Lead Twitter’s Cringey Viral Meme Unit
After firing half of his staff this week, Elon Musk announced today he’s using the social media company’s extra budget to tap former Seahawk...
Green Lake Paddle Boarders Spotted Migrating I-5 South for Winter
Nature lovers rejoiced in Seattle today as massive flocks of Green Lake-native paddle boarders started their annual migration I-5 South to warmer California climes.
“Nature...
15 Signs You’re Too Cozy To Go Out Tonight, Seattle
As the sun sets on Seattle, the dreary elements, seasonal depression and packs of wild raccoons descend rapidly on our fair city. The warm...
Local White Man Honors Indigenous Peoples’ Day by Taking Entire Day Off from Talking About Being Seattle Native
In a moving show of respect, sacrifice, and deference, today local white man Don Pudd honored Indigenous Peoples' Day by successfully taking an entire...
Home Gardening Virtuoso Successfully Turns $800 into a Side Salad
As Seattle's home gardeners begin their fall harvest this month, today one mistro of the local homegrown produce scene impressed his family and friends...
Left Lane Camper Spotted Roaming I-5 Safely Relocated, Released onto Highway 99
Today state outdoor transportation life officials are celebrating the safe capture, relocation, and release of a local left lane camper onto Highway 99 after...
Woodland Park Zoo Publicly Apologizes for Inviting Ozzy Osbourne to Perform at ZooTunes
Woodland Park Zoo has issued an apology today after heavy metal pioneer Ozzy Osbourne was caught trying to eat several bats housed in the...
Museum of Museums Acquires New Museum for Museum’s Collection of Museum Museums
The museum to end all museums, today the Seattle’s Museum of Museums acquired a new museum to add to the museum’s permanent collection of...
Summer Fit Tips to Look Sizzling in Ring Camera Footage Neighbor Posts on Nextdoor
Catch a glimpse of yourself on a Nextdoor post about a suspicious neighbor looking a little paunchier than desired? No problem: Just follow these...
Tuba Players and Accordionists to Finally Get Laid as Hispanic Heritage Month and Oktoberfest Approach
The change in seasons becomes official this week as the combination of Hispanic Heritage Month and Oktoberfest brings about the annual laying of the...
