Repeated Calls for ‘Backdoor’ Going Unanswered, Reports Metro Bus Driver’s Wife
The decades-long struggle for people’s desperate "backdoor" cries to be heard is reportedly worse than most already thought after it was discovered that even the repeated backdoor calls of one King County Metro bus...
#RelationshipGoals! These Two Just Set Up a Tent Without Killing Each Other
Social media is abuzz today with news that local couple Rachel and Thomas Yardsworth have officially set up an entire tent together without even killing each other.
“To be safe, we first practiced putting it...
Seattle Lesbian Bar Wildrose Shuttered Over Lewd Exposed Ankle Violations
Citing for the second weekend in a row some of its most arcane and outdated laws at Seattle gay bars, this weekend Washington state’s Liquor Control Board shut down historic lesbian bar Wildrose over...
Long-term Study of College Cannabis Use Forgets Why
Today the results of a highly anticipated, long-term study on the effects of cannabis use on college students were expected to be released until Evergreen State University researchers realized they don’t even know why...
Seattle Police Department Forms ‘Male Nipple Exposure Prevention Task Force’
Following a weekend raid on Seattle gay bars that resulted in several citation threats for the “exposure of a male nipple,” today the Seattle Police Department formally announced the creation of their new “Male...
‘The Weather Isn’t That Bad,’ Says Woman Using 6 Forms of Artificial Sunlight
According to one local woman who cocoons in at least six artificial forms of sunlight a day, Seattle weather reportedly “really isn’t that bad.”
“The whole lack of sun thing is sort of an urban...
Dry January Fully Supported by Boyfriend Who Won’t Go Down On You
One local woman says she’s less than a week away from finishing a successful Dry January, and it’s all thanks to being supported all the way through by her boyfriend, Henry, who doesn’t ever...
Seattle Parks Agrees to Turn Its Children’s Playground Proposal for Gay Nude Beach Into Adult Playground
After the local LGBTQ+ community came out strong against a city proposal to build a new children’s playground at a longtime gay nude beach, today Seattle Parks announced it wanted to apologize for not...
Area Geoduck Wonders How Naked Man Breathes Through That Little Thing
Upon seeing a naked man in all his glory for the first time after a local New Year’s Day Polar Plunge today, one area geoduck says he’s just wondering how that guy breathes through...
Local Businesses Lit Up with Red, Green, White and Black in Solidarity with Palestine
Bravely taking a stand with millions of starving civilians being indiscriminately bombed every day with no safe place to go or escape, businesses across Seattle have been illuminating their buildings with red, green, white,...
