Hero! Man Thaws Seattle Freeze by Talking to Every Attractive Woman on Bus
You might’ve heard of the Seattle Freeze: the stereotype that Seattleites are notoriously hard to make friends with. But one local hero is doing...
Seattle Officials Continue to Insist “West Edge” is a Real Neighborhood
Head of the Downtown Seattle Association, Garett Brooks, held a press conference this afternoon to remind everyone that West Edge is a “real neighborhood”...
Area Man Just Can’t Find Time for 2-Minute Meditation Practice
After being advised by his doctor to take up a two-minute daily meditation practice, Tom Sweeney, 43, has some scheduling concerns.“My life is just...
Finally! San Francisco Lets Seattle Sit at Their Lunch Table
Celebration filled the streets of Seattle as its foggier upperclassman, San Francisco, finally allowed the Emerald City to sit at their lunch table.
While seemingly...
Man’s Faith in Imminent Rise of Atheism Shaken After Visit to Bellevue
Friends of a Seattle atheist report he has been rendered virtually catatonic after accidentally witnessing the popularity of church-going during a recent visit to...
Local Musician Launches Kickstarter to Fund Relevancy
Local musician Todd Shoemaker has announced on social media
that he’s launching a campaign on Kickstarter to raise money and awareness for
his relevance.
“My friends,...
International District Renamed Everywhere District
Seattle residents are applauding the renaming of the International District, colloquially known as “the ID”, to the more inclusive Everywhere District.
“It’s really a big...
Study Finds Tourists With Umbrella 37% More Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
A landmark study that's flying in the face of conventional Seattle wisdom has found that tourists with umbrellas tested 37 percent higher in supercalifragilisticexpialidociousness.
"Although...
Local Hipster Starts New Seattle Arts Magazine, Realizes She Doesn’t Have The Right Haircut
Local hipster Sarah E. Miller was dead-set on starting a new kind of Seattle arts magazine when she realized, to her horror, that she...
“Seattle Squeeze? Yes, Please!” Jokes Divorcee Desperate For Warmth Of Human Touch
The closure of the Alaskan Way Viaduct has strained traffic around the region for weeks, causing tempers to flare for many – but not...
