Man Dressed as Gandalf in Bikini Grossly Misunderstands ‘Sexy Fantasy’ Theme at Halloween Party
Standing out amongst a sea of scantily clad nurses and pizza deliverymen, one man allegedly gruesomely misunderstood the “sexy fantasy” theme at a local...
Seattle Haunted House Terrifies Locals by Forcing Them to Interact with Strangers
Local Halloween aficionados all seem to agree that this year the most terrifying haunted house in Seattle is hands-down Georgetown’s Merry Manor, where strangers...
Man Clearly Trying to Shazam Song at Funeral
After being given the benefit of the doubt for a full minute that he just had T-Mobile or something, a group of mourners realized...
Massive Workplace Morale Issue Magically Solved with Starbucks Gift Cards
Senior management at local company InnoPixel are celebrating this week after solving a consistent pattern of dissatisfaction among their employees by distributing $5 Starbucks...
Elon Musk Taps Russell Wilson to Lead Twitter’s Cringey Viral Meme Unit
After firing half of his staff this week, Elon Musk announced today he’s using the social media company’s extra budget to tap former Seahawk...
Green Lake Paddle Boarders Spotted Migrating I-5 South for Winter
Nature lovers rejoiced in Seattle today as massive flocks of Green Lake-native paddle boarders started their annual migration I-5 South to warmer California climes.
“Nature...
15 Signs You’re Too Cozy To Go Out Tonight, Seattle
As the sun sets on Seattle, the dreary elements, seasonal depression and packs of wild raccoons descend rapidly on our fair city. The warm...
Home Gardening Virtuoso Successfully Turns $800 into a Side Salad
As Seattle's home gardeners begin their fall harvest this month, today one mistro of the local homegrown produce scene impressed his family and friends...
Left Lane Camper Spotted Roaming I-5 Safely Relocated, Released onto Highway 99
Today state outdoor transportation life officials are celebrating the safe capture, relocation, and release of a local left lane camper onto Highway 99 after...
Woodland Park Zoo Publicly Apologizes for Inviting Ozzy Osbourne to Perform at ZooTunes
Woodland Park Zoo has issued an apology today after heavy metal pioneer Ozzy Osbourne was caught trying to eat several bats housed in the...
