Therapist’s Office Has Great View of South Lake Union But Windows Don’t Open
We're interrupting your regularly scheduled broadcast of fake news to bring you this breaking report: Life can be rough. Please have empathy for those who may be struggling, including yourself. If you or someone...
Woman Has Quiet Night In with Husband, Boyfriend, Girlfriend, and Girlfriend’s Boyfriend
Beacon Hill resident Meghan Jones confessed tonight, after a long work week, that all she wants is a quiet, calm night in with her husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, and girlfriend’s boyfriend.
“I like to keep it...
Louis C.K. Fan Wondering If It’ll Ever Be Okay to Suck a Bag of Dick’s Again
Hope is fading fast for one man who is wondering if he’ll ever be able to enjoy sucking down a bag of Dick’s again without reprisal.
Ever since the #MeToo movement took down his comedic...
Seattle Gives Portland Unplugged Xbox Controller to Play Halo
In a gesture of feigned generosity, Seattle gave Portland its second Xbox controller to play Halo. The catch: It was unplugged the entire time.
A half hour of Portland pestering Seattle for a turn prompted...
Amazon Announces Pop-up Shop in Your Parents’ Kitchen for “Black Thursday”
Retail giant Amazon announced today plans for a pop-up shop in your parents’ kitchen on the day before Black Friday, or what the company is calling “Black Thursday.”
“Our location data showed that, for some...
Californian Denounces Perfectly Fine Mexican Restaurant
California native Rhea Larkin made waves today as she took to social media to denounce a perfectly fine Mexican restaurant in Ballard.
“These have to be the worst tacos I’ve ever had,” she wrote in...
REPORT: Capitol Hill Restaurant Apparently Also A Comedy Club Or Something?
Monissa Davis and Arren Hanks had planned a quiet night out on Capitol Hill for their third anniversary dinner and somehow ended up at some kind of comedy show?
“We heard this place was super...
Tacoma Traffic Jam Still Coolest Thing To Do In Tacoma
Dozens of drivers put their vehicles in park during Saturday's completely stalled traffic on I-5 to celebrate what is still widely hailed as the coolest thing to do in Tacoma: Traffic Jam.
“Everybody’s hanging...
Space Needle Begins Charging Bathroom Fee
Citing necessary plumbing upgrades for the only building in Seattle that vertically shoots human excreta several hundred feet every day all day, Space Needle officials announced today that it will now charge visitors $7.50...
Paul Allen Is Gone, But You Can Still Pay $30 to Look at His Toys
More than a week after the death of Microsoft co-founder and ostensible philanthropist Paul Allen, visitors of Seattle’s Museum of Popular Culture (MoPOP) were overjoyed to find they can still look at his toys...
