8 Fall Activities That Distract You From The Fact That You Have Nobody To Do Them With
Guest Post from University of Washington-based Off Leash
1.Corn Maze – For the adventurous, these winding labyrinths of corn offer a great way to spend an...
Rover Announces New Walking Service for Quarantined Shut-ins
Seattle dog walking service Rover has today announced it will be expanding its services to provide daily socially distanced walks to attention-starved quarantine shut-ins...
Local Woman Longs to Experience Other Bathrooms
Local woman Rachel Sellman confirmed witness reports today that her longing stares out rain-drenched windows are due to her endless craving for the novelty...
Exhausted Parents Consider Transitioning Son to Outdoor Child
Following eight exhausting months trapped inside with their offspring and attempting house-training, a Greenwood couple has reportedly begun preliminary discussions about moving their son...
‘The South Shall Rise Again,’ Says Man Who’s Never Left Eastern Washington
Standing outside his dusty ranch just off Interstate 90, Samuel Dunn confirmed to reporters this afternoon that “The South shall rise again” despite never...
Modern-Day Casanova Sets First Zoom Date as ‘Recurring Meeting’
The online dating world was set aflutter today as word spread that one modern-day Casanova has been pre-emptively setting first dates up as ‘recurring...
Wolverines Return to Washington State Convention Center for First Time Since Comic Con
Animal conservationists and comic book nerds alike are abuzz today after this morning’s surprise sighting of the first Wolverines to return to the Washington...
Local Woman’s Nightly Self-Care Routine Just Switching to Series of Smaller Devices
Local Instagram influencer Megan Murray has garnered public praise in health and wellness circles today after finally spilling the secrets of her highly successful...
Baton-Twirling Performative Ally Could Really Take it Down a Notch
After dedicating several free baton-twirling performances in front of her Central District home this last month to the Black Lives Matter movement, non-white neighbors...
Major Trump Donor Appointed As The Postal Service’s New Lead Singer
After months of publicly trashing The Postal Service, President Donald Trump announced that he’s appointed multi-million-dollar campaign donor Louis DeJoy as the Seattle band's...
