After mealtimes started suddenly being withheld from dogs across the city for what some canines are calling an eternity this weekend, one local pup is calling out his owner and let him know he didn’t sign up for whatever this Daylight Savings bullshit is.
“So, let me get this straight: You humans pick an arbitrary day in November, change the fabric of time itself to move the clock an hour back, and because of all that I have to wait an extra hour for mealtimes today? I’m calling bullshit,” said local dog Mutty Vedder, staring incredulously at their empty food bowl. “I just hope you know that an hour from now when I gobble down my food twice as fast and puke all over the carpet, that’s on you, pal. Man’s best friend my ass.”
The tragedy hit especially hard for local dogs experiencing their first daylight savings time this year.
“The cat tried to warn me this happened last year, but I didn’t want to believe her. Why have you forsaken me, human?” howled local husky Pawl Rudd, whining dramatically for their food. “I can’t last another minute without dinner, I’m perishing! When I’m gone, I need you to tell the cat … tell her she can’t have any of my toys!”
Meanwhile across the city, local parents were also heard howling dramatically as their pets woke them up an hour before they had to for breakfast anyway.
