Inflation woes continued to mount today as diners excited for Beth’s Cafe grand re-opening were shocked to find that the surging price of eggs had resulted in their 12-egg omelette now costing $37,000.
“I should have known I was in trouble when the omelettes said ‘market price’ next to them,” said longtime Beth’s regular Keith Meadows. “When I got the check, I almost had a heart attack—which wouldn’t be unusual after a delicious meal at Beth’s—but I hadn’t even finished the hash browns yet. The extra plate charge was still only $1.75 though, which was nice of them.”
But, despite the inflation issues, diners still lined up around the block to recapture that old Beth’s magic and remind their aortas who’s boss.
“I could either shell out $37k for the Southern Exposure omelette or three credits at UW, and only one of those is getting rid of this hangover—so I think the choice was pretty obvious,” said UW art student Franklin Goyer, tucking into his breakfast. “Besides, they’re giving out free art supplies and displaying local art in their gallery space—this is an artist’s dream! I call this one ‘Saturn Devouring His Son’s Leftover Pancakes.’”
Beth’s Cafe is also reportedly piloting a “wheelbarrow valet” service that would roll satisfied diners out of the restaurant and dump them near their car.
