This morning local officials gathered aboard the 2 Line to celebrate the historic first crosslake light rail commuter to flip off I-90 Bridge rush hour traffic.
“Fuck that shit forever,” said commuter Mark Miller as he flipped off thick car traffic to raucous applause and a ribbon-cutting for the train’s first traffic flip-off. “That commute time, that $6 a gallon, and every asshole who kept this day from coming years earlier. I hereby declare fuck ever driving to work on the Eastside again.”
After everyone on the train raised a middle finger to mark the momentous occasion, everyone agreed what a privilege it was to witness such a historic moment for the region.
“Oh, I wouldn’t have missed it for the world,” said King County Councilmember Claudia Balducci, who was instrumental in getting light rail stations opened on the Eastside so commuters could flip off car commutes as soon as realistically possible. “And how amazing that both Girmay and Katie could each bring their children so they can one day grow up and flip off car traffic if it even still exists while on a light rail line to Kirkland, Issaquah and maybe even Ballard.”
By press time, Sound Transit was reportedly also already installing a plaque to commemorate where on the 2 Line train I-90 traffic was first mooned.
