Local marine biologists have discovered one picky orca calf won’t eat their rich unless their mom cuts them into little yacht shapes.
“Bigg’s orcas usually aren’t as picky about what they eat, but this little rudder-snapper won’t eat a thing his mom puts in front of him unless she cuts it into little yacht shapes,” said researcher Cam Florence. “She tried seal and salmon shapes but the only thing little Luigi here wants to tear to pieces and eat are yachts.”
The calf apparently got hooked on eating his food in yacht-shapes after his mother did it once just to get him in the habit of eating his rich.
“Based on some of the communication we’ve picked up between orca mothers, his mom knew the rich are disgusting and thought cutting them into yacht shapes might make her baby like eating them more,” Florence said. “Now it’s the only way he’ll eat them at all. Hopefully soon he’ll be old enough to cut Jeff Bezos into yacht shapes on his own.”
At press time the orca mother was reportedly also stressing about getting her baby interested in washing up without always bathing in the blood of their sworn enemies.
