Rumors are swirling that the juicy turkey who just arrived at one local Thanksgiving dinner obviously got saline injections and dermal fillers done ahead of the occasion.
“Well, look who got some rosemary butter dermal filler,” whispered Aunt Christine to Cousin Kristen while side-eyeing the turkey. “Looks like someone plumped Jenny-O up with some saline injections too. If you ask me, she’s also spending too much time inside the tanning bed – looks completely baked. Just last week she was as white as a plucked chicken.”
Tired of the gossip after overhearing it, the turkey set the record straight.
“Omg, all I had done yesterday to make my breasts and thighs juicier was take a salt bath,” said the turkey. “Okay, it’s true I got herbal butter dermal filler, but I look and smell amazing. Those catty gossips are just jealous and wish their husbands wanted to eat them as much.”
At press time, Aunt Christine and Cousin Kristen were still taking turns wondering how much the turkey weighs and where it was raised.
