Tired by a constant barrage of one rainstorm after another this winter and even early spring, today Californian Katie Berry moved up to Seattle to get some more sun.
“You know, at some point the rain, the gloomy skies and landslides, they just get to you—I had to get out of there,” said Katie, now a former Angeleno. “I’m sorry—I’m just one of those people who needs more sun and blue skies, so I obviously had to move to Seattle where you only get half as much winter rainfall as Los Angeles does.”
This afternoon, Katie was already sunbathing at Golden Gardens and destroying fields of wildflowers for glamorous Instagram photos.
“This is what I’m talking about—real Vitamin D straight from the sun, not some gross cod liver oil supplements or tanning beds ugh,” Katie said as she browsed social for how many people liked her wildflower murder photos and how sad people stuck back in LA still are. “Oh my God, a literal tornado ripped off people’s roofs in Montebello and there’s no sign it’s going to stop raining anytime soon–see that’s what I’m talking about. I just had to escape.”
At press time, Katie’s depression almost returned in full force upon realizing what Seattleites’ idea of good Mexican food is until another kind California transplant soul told her about El Camion.
