While the entire world collectively suffered the wrath of 2020, one spoiled unborn brat is reportedly on track for sparing himself the misery of the worst year in memory by deciding not to arrive before January 1st.
“I thought my unborn child might be gracious enough to commiserate with me for at least a day or two in 2020, but it looks like this entitled fetus is just skipping this entire trashfire of a year altogether and cruising straight into 2021,” said Dawn Harris, patting her pregnant belly and squinting. “I’ll bet he already thinks he’s better than me.”
Sensing an opportunity to bully a child for their involuntary generational differences, scores of middle-aged men took to Facebook to air their grievances with the baby.
“This is what’s wrong with kids today, can you believe the nerve of this lazy brat?” seethed Hank Smith on a lengthy Facebook rant. “Just loafing about in his womb with a view, being spoon-fed placenta without a care in the world. Back in my day we walked out of the womb, got into a fistfight with the doctor, bought a cigarette off some guy in the waiting room and hit the production line before the umbilical was cut. Millions of hard-working babies were born in the worst year ever and do you hear them crying about it? Well yes, but you know what I mean.”
When reached for comment, the baby responded with an ultrasound image of his unborn derriere.
