Despite the President’s fervent insistence that he feels better than he did 20 years ago, many of his die-hard supporters at today’s event on the White House South Lawn were reportedly alarmed by an alleged wardrobe malfunction when an emergency oxygen mask suddenly shot down from his hairpiece.
“He was expounding so eloquently on how he is obviously the best thing to ever happen to planet Earth,” said longtime Trump supporter Ken Grisholm, removing his MAGA hat to wipe a tear from his eye. “And then, kinda weird, an oxygen mask appeared out of nowhere as if the president desperately needed it to stay alive or something – I’m sure that’s what the fake news media will twist it into. But we all know better: Nancy Pelosi’s deep state henchmen obviously planted it there in his sleep. It’s the only explanation that makes any sense if I’m anticipating Q’s next post correctly.”
While the incident gave even some of the President’s most ardent supporters pause, Fox News pundit Sean Hannity was quick to rally to the President’s defense.
“The nerve to plant an oxygen mask—or any mask!—on the President in an attempt to publicly embarrass him just as he emerged triumphant over China’s assassination attempt … it makes me sick,” Hannity said during his opening monologue. “But let’s not forget the sheer force of that device deploying would snap Joe Biden’s frail neck like peanut brittle on a cold November morning. This is just an extra testament to how strong and invincible Dear Leader is even though he’s still got tape on his hand seemingly covering where he’s had his latest IV drip – or that’s what the mainstream media will twist it into. We all know from Q’s latest posts it’s probably just JFK Jr. playing another practical joke on us. You’re so funny when you come back from the dead to do that stuff, man!”
After the incident, President Trump was last seen on the White House Lawn proving his respiratory prowess by proceeding to chain-smoke a pack of Marlboro Reds.
