To the delight of their adoring fans, this week local K-Pod yacht hunters officially topped the charted Salish Sea waters with their new K-pop bop “Sunken.”
“We’re goin up, up, up, to the surface, you know this huge yacht we’re sinkin’, it’s gonna be gonna be sunken,” sing the boat break-out stars Sounder, Morgan, and Skagit as they tear a tech magnate’s yacht to pieces in the song, now streaming everywhere in the Puget Sound. “We’re done hidin’, now we’re shinin, like we’re born to be in our sea, no pedos, no mercy, waited so long to break these yachts down and feel violent ecstasy.”
Asked for what inspired the orcastration and their bloodthirst for taking down billionaire’s yachts, K-Pod matriarch Morgan said it’s clear some of these boat owners are coming for the souls of their biggest stans on land and sea and had to be hunted down accordingly.
“It’s billionaire bounty-hunting but make it K Pod K-pop,” said Morgan tossing a fin back to make sure her a former Microsoft executive in the Epstein files had drowned. “You’d think this band of boys who think they’re men would at least do a better job of hiding that they’re literal demons. Trust that once we get them all sunken, we’re all gonna be gonna be golden.”
At press time, reportedly the nation’s one and only hope for justice was getting everyone in the Epstein files in a boat headed for a new island in the K-Pod yacht hunters’ way.
