Seattle’s last public bathroom, “Brownie”, died last night in her Downtown home, marking 57 years since she was separated from her wild, unlocked pod of once plentiful public bathrooms.
“She made an impact on so many people,” said Seattle Parks spokesperson Erica Chen. “From confused tourists to locals looking for a restful place to remove the antitheft devices from their electronics, she will be missed by all.”
Brownie, who battled MRSA, flea-borne typhus and all but one kind of sexually transmitted infection, was reportedly comfortable in her final hours.
“As her caregivers, we dedicated our lives to making her life better,” Chen said. “Now we are entering a new era where Seattle’s bathrooms are safe in responsible private collections, or wild and free.”
The public is advised to keep an eye out for Brownie’s wild relative, the P-Patch.
