Immediately after the Seattle City Council approved an expansion of a surveillance camera system for the Seattle Police Department, Mayor Bruce Harrell announced he’s already proposing its further expansion to the Denny Blaine Park nudist beach.
“Just wanna make sure they’re not being sickos out there, you know?” said Harrell from a dark room in his home that is reportedly definitely in Seattle. “The camera feed my friend and U Village owner Stuart Sloan has on the scene right now is just too grainy and blurry—we could really use some taxpayer dollars for a nice set of HD cameras on the place.”
The current plan for expansion stretches onto Aurora, 3rd Avenue and International District despite the ACLU, Planned Parenthood and countless other local human rights organizations being against the expansion of a local surveillance state.
“Oh my God, the only people who are going to be looking at these camera feeds are cops who definitely care about women’s reproductive rights and weren’t in DC on Jan. 6—calm down,” Harrell said. “In addition to cops keeping careful watch over the city, I will be able to look at the feeds myself but only for public safety reasons.”
At press time, Mayor Harrell confirmed that on occasion others may be invited to looking over Denny Blaine surveillance cameras including his dear friend and former Mayor Ed Murray.
