After a month of charging customers an extra $5 per order to cover the cost of Seattle’s new mandatory minimum wage for delivery drivers, today Uber Eats said it’s doing away with the unpopular fee and will instead pay drivers with half your meal.
“Everybody wins now: Customers don’t pay fees and lose a few LBs from eating fewer calories. Drivers no longer go hungry. And, most importantly, the billionaires running Uber are never paid a cent less even though this entire business model was arguably violating countless labor laws from the start,” said Cloris Jannigan, Chief Innovation Officer for Uber Eats. “In our view, Seattle’s minimum wage is beyond fair when you sweeten the deal with half a turkey pesto panini from Panera.”
Jannigan said Uber is confident delivery drivers will love the surprise and delight factor that comes with receiving random food items from customer orders in lieu of cash.
“It’s a nice carrot we’re offering delivery drivers—a literal one if someone orders two carrots,” Jannigan said. “Let’s be honest: We’re just eliminating a step for drivers – most of their money probably gets spent on food anyway.”
At press time, Uber Eats also released a new marketing campaign advertising that its orders now come topped with free, immunity-boosting human probiotics.
