As Washington COVID cases continue to decrease, part of Gov. Inslee’s Phase Three plan includes allowing the Mariners fan to attend opening day on April 1st at the T-Mobile Park stadium and all games moving forward.
“It’s been over a year since our fan, Roger Timmons, was able to buy a vastly overpriced ticket to ride a roller coaster of disappointment in person,” said M’s spokesperson Craig Martin. “Our players are really going to get motivation from having him back in the stands, shotgunning hotdogs and beer, scrolling through Tinder, paying very little attention to a game that was over after the first inning. I truly believe bringing back our fan is the spark this team needs to finish this season in baseball purgatory for the umpteenth time.”
When asked how he felt about the M’s upcoming season, Timmins expressed his True to the Blue dedication with what he admits is the same forced optimism he brings to every new baseball season.
“I’m feeling absolutely confident that we’ll once again both be bad enough to miss the playoffs and slightly too good to reach that decent prospect sweet-spot,” said Timmins. “When it comes to being the only professional baseball team that’s never made it to World Series, it’s all about consistency.”
As the team continues to prepare for their first game in front of a single fan-packed crowd, the Mariners’ new CEO said he can’t wait to finally meet their fan Face to Face.
