Interim Seattle Police Chief Adrian Diaz has swiftly reprimanded several Seattle police officers who attended the Capitol riots in Washington, D.C. last week with paid administrative leave to riot the White House next week.
“We don’t want to rush into firing them just because they made a deliberate choice to spend hundreds of dollars and travel thousands of miles to attend an openly seditious demonstration supporting the violent overthrow of United States’ democracy—I mean that’s every American’s unconstitutional right,” said Diaz in a statement. “So, until we find photographic evidence that they were personally crushing Capitol police officers’ heads and rib cages with their own bare hands, we’re punishing these officers with paid administrative leave to riot the nation’s capital again next week.”
While the officers are under investigation, Diaz says he doesn’t want any potential slap on the wrist they’re about to get to inconvenience them too much.
“We know how hard it is for these guys to be held even slightly accountable, so we want to make sure we’re still covering their airfare and hotel stays in case they’re planning to riot the nation’s capital again during inauguration next week,” Diaz said. “Like I said, if all they’re doing is consistently supporting sedition and insurrection against American democracy, that’s their unconstitutional right and not enough reason to assume they’re a bunch of racist nut-jobs with no business attempting fair law enforcement in the City of Seattle.”
Diaz also confirmed that unless a photo surfaces of the officers impaling a minimum of three people with a with a flagpole, nothing about their attendance at the rally is worrisome or fishy enough to justify termination.
