After several consecutive days of overzealous bike-bell ringing at strangers walking along the Sammamish River Trail, Redmond bicyclist Dean Higgins admitted that his avid bicycling is “all about that ring-a-ding-ding, baby.”
“Who needs a $5,000 racing bike and compression shorts? They all play second-fiddle to the joy of ringing a bike bell a hundred times a day at these unsuspecting bi-peds,” said Higgins. “My favorite is ringing it not so much as a warning to people up ahead, but as something extra to scare the shit out of pedestrians right as a I pass them.”
Higgins’ friends confirmed his unquenchable need to bum-rush lollygaggers taking up too much space on the coveted blacktop trail which links Woodinville to Mexico.
King County plans to add another lane to the crowded arterial soon to allow more passing aggression in both directions.
An informal poll of pedestrians on the trail today confirmed that 99 percent of them still preferred hearing Higgins’ bike bell to “on your left” screamed directly into their ears.
