Fighting between factions of Ballard’s trendy dessert establishments continued to escalate this week with no signs of abating.

The Hot Cakes and Frankie & Jo’s alliance has been stone-cold in its ongoing face-off against Portland-based newcomer Salt & Straw, which has struggled to secure a foothold in the already oversaturated Ballard dessert market.

“When Salt & Straw started putting their enemies’ bone marrow into a new ice cream flavor, it just went too far,” said Ballard resident Tom Ward. “I can’t even get near these places anymore. It’s too dangerous.”

A recent attempt by Salt & Straw to align with neighborhood stronghold Pie Bar resulted in dark cherry concentrate shed on both sides.

Undoubtedly, residents have suffered the most in the ongoing skirmishes, as their constant sugar cravings continually put them in the line of fire between the warring shops.

Denise Higgins, a mother of three in the neighborhood, said the murderous glances they received from Salt & Straw staff while walking by with Full Tilt Mexican chocolate ice cream cones have scarred them for life.

“Why must we choose sides?,” Higgins said, glancing nervously over her shoulder.

At press time, Hood Famous Bakeshop and Cupcake Royale’s attempts at a ceasefire had reportedly only left all parties more frosted.

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