In a viral video that’s already been shared over a million times in its first 24 hours, a Nazi agitator is seen harassing people on Seattle’s Capitol Hill until a mean anti-fascist sticker positively KO’s his ass in the middle of the sidewalk.
“I went to all the trouble of finding parking on the Hill so I could exercise my first amendment right to threaten and intimidate strangers with my second amendment right,” whined recently pardoned Nazi Darren Miller, who asked to remain anonymous. “I had no idea there would be stickers on every trash can, lamp post, and bike rack telling me, the all American Nazi next door, to fuck off and die. It really makes a guy feel unwelcome and extremely concussed.”
Paramedics on the scene say this incident is not unique.
“Last week a billionaire saw a ‘Deny, Defend, Depose’ sticker and spontaneously combusted,” said EMT Omar Duale. “The stickers create a kind of force field that turns hurt feelings into hurt people but somehow it only works on bigots, blowhards, and bastards. I’ve had calls to help ICE and SPOG, landlords and oligarchs, and one tourist who fell off a Lime Scooter – I think that last one was unrelated, but he was wearing a red hat so I can’t be sure.”
Activists say blanketing the city in aggressive stickers is the second-best form of resistance after writing snarky satire articles for moderately circulated fake news websites.
