For the extraordinary scientific feat of discovering and then showing as many people as possible what happens when you eat marshmallows dipped in liquid nitrogen, this weekend Bill Nye was honored with the Presidential Medal of Freedom.
“Wah ah hohor, thah you mitah presideh,” said Nye, with clouds of water vapor crystalized vapor billowing out of his nitrogen-marshmallow filled mouth as he accepted one of the nation’s top honor. “See? Still cool, huh? Wahw! Sciuhnz!”
Nye also made history as the first speedwalker in history to earn the honor.
“For far too long, we speedwalkers—especially crime-fighting ones—haven’t gotten the respect we deserve,” said Nye, longtime International Speedwalking Association Champion. “I’m so honored to increase representation of both speedwalkers and racewalkers such as myself and hopefully one day Bryan Cranston for his legendary athleticism we all saw on Malcolm in the Middle. Semper heel-toe-heel-toe.”
Nye’s other life-changing scientific accomplishments include discovering how to make TV programming kids can watch while teachers catch up on grading papers.
