Today the Make-A-Wish Foundation announced that in addition to fulfilling the wishes of dying children, they will now also make dreams come true for the terminally online.
“Estimates put around 30% of the internet population online almost constantly,” says Make-A-Wish spokesperson Rick Rollins. “These are people who essentially have no life at all, and that’s functionally equivalent to being dead, so we decided to make a difference in their lives before they upload completely.”
Rollins reports the most frequent wish from extremely online beneficiaries is for dank memes.
One online “Wish Kid” posted their experience to 4chan’s /maw/ Make-A-Wish imageboard.
>be me
>19
>blue pilled normies want to do a Mr. Beast
>laugh crying emoji
>paws
>maybe i don’t have to die a virgin
>lightbulb.jpg
>i can haz OnlyFans qt3.14-p?
>loading.exe
>WWE Superslam fanfare
>wtf.xlsx
>unexpected John Cena
>shocked pikachu face
TL;DR: netizens @ a | || || |_ get lulz from r/charity before going afk.
