The Sound Transit Board announced today a new effort to reduce their red tape budget by strongly considering a new whitepaper on the benefits of a dedicated committee for the creation and implementation of a series of guidelines with the express purpose of streamlining what is often an unnecessarily convoluted environment for the maintenance and expansion of the region’s buses and trains.
“The first step will be soliciting community feedback,” explains King County Executive and Sound Transit Board Chair Dow Constantine. “We’ll start with six scoping meetings in each neighborhood which will naturally each be two months apart so everyone has a chance to get deja vu from our weekly progress reports. These open house meetings will feature full scale 3D renderings of our Moby Dick sized environmental impact statement on the potential energy savings of not publishing Moby Dick sized environmental impact statements. These renderings will be translated into 20 real languages and 4 fictional ones.”
Proponents hope this initiative will speed up the ST3 Link extensions to Ballard and West Seattle.
“None of that will actually speed up the ST3 Link extensions to Ballard and West Seattle but I’ll tell you what I think will,” Constantine said. “Convening the board to vote on a referendum to earmark funds to explore the viability of reviewing such project velocity improvements to ensure their timely completion on or before the retirement of the grandchildren of the as-of-yet unborn.”
Sound Transit will be hiring consultants to advise the study and they encourage community members to apply, perhaps while you’re waiting in the rain for the next 8 ghost bus.
