One local millennial parent was struggling to adjust to new Halloween ‘Trunk or Treat’ traditions after years of being told to never take candy from strangers in a van.
“I know that this whole ‘Trunk or Treat’ thing is perfectly safe, but it just feels like it goes against everything Scruff McGruff taught me,” said millennial parent Rob Crawford, watching his kids run around a parking lot. “I grew up watching GI Joe and Saved by the Bell, and they’d always have a stranger danger episode, but now I’m telling my kids to go ask Jason Voorhees if he can get them a Snickers bar from his Astro Van.”
Local man in an unmarked van Bert Gunderson was also reportedly struggling with the new Trick or Treating tradition.
“This whole ‘Trunk or Treat’ thing is weird for me too, you think I drive a creepy unmarked van because I want people talking to me? Now I got kids asking me for candy everytime I stop at a red light,” said Gunderson, trying not to make eye contact with a child dressed as Spider-Man climbing on the hood of his work van. “All I got is construction materials back there, but I got half the Avengers chasing me all over town like I’m the ice cream truck.”
Despite the recent changes to Halloween candy conveyance, experts still recommend not taking candy from anyone in a Tesla.
