Featuring a wide variety of franchised food truck vendors from LA to Orange County, the Bite of Seattle’s new California-based owner and operator says this weekend’s exciting foodie event at Seattle Center promises attendees a delicious array of zero bites from Seattle.
“Unlike last year’s fiasco when this event got ruined by a tech startup owner that forced everyone to download and use its glitchy payment app, this year people will be able to use their own credit cards and cash to pay vendors who are definitely just flying into Seattle from Costa Mesa for the weekend,” said CEO Brad Hemsworth of Foodieland, which acquired the Bite of Seattle in January. “We initially thought of changing the event name to Bite of California, but were told by the one person in Seattle we knew that would probably be a bad idea for some reason. It’s important to us to keep the Bite of Seattle the same event the Emerald City has known and loved for 42 years in name only so people still want to buy food here for some reason.”
Local foodies say they’re excited to dive in, not recognize the name of a single vendor and be the first to post a photo on Instagram of them drinking out of a torso-sized baby bottle sporting a bib that says “Can’t Adult Today.”
“Look, I can easily get an actual bite from Seattle any day I live in Seattle,” said local foodie Lauren Smith. “What I really want is to eat seafood from a mystery vendor with no online presence to research the quality of and artery-clogging food that saves me a trip to the Puyallup Fair in September.”
At press time, foodies planning on still going to Bite of Seattle said they couldn’t wait to eat a Giant Deep Fried Squid on a stick whether or not it’s locally sourced from the Seattle Kraken.
